Meds changes

Another day, another med change. It was a strange day. Very racy and edgy. To the point my hands would shake if I held still. I spend hours and hours working numbers. That did not help my shaking hands. Think my brain was shaking by the time I headed to the gym. I was out of sorts. The day started fighting with my partner. Clearly not a good way to get started. It didn’t improve much from there. Spending hours on financials and then finishing the day spending 3 hours at the doctor’s office just made for a crappy day. At least I finally faced up to the back pain issues, instead of ignoring it. It is so hard. I don’t like living life with pain. I have enough things going on in my head. But to wake up every time I try to roll over in bed, or not being able to bend over for something for the first hour after I get up. It is tough. I have just learned to deal with the normal baseline pain. and have learned to avoid moving in specific ways, though it has become increasingly hard. A I have worked harder in the gym my back just got worse. So, it was long overdue. Least I have a plan to try to manage the pain without popping pills. In the meantime I just have to get thru till the end of the month when I see the pain specialist to have it injected. For now I keep training and we ramp up the seroquel to see if we can get it to work as an antidepressant.

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